18 Things Everyone Will Experience When Apartment Hunting
1. You set a solid price range and promise yourself you won’t deviate from it, because that’s what adults do.
And that’s what you are right now, damnit.
2. You will completely forget about your price range and spend more than you can actually afford, because every decent apartment is not within your budget.
An extra $300 won’t hurt, right? RIGHT?!?
3. You become an expert at weeding out psychopaths on the internet.
Bypassing the creepy old guys who prefer a female roommate in her twenties is a lot harder than many people think.
4. You put so many hours into looking for a place that it soon becomes a full-time job, except for one small difference: You’re not getting paid for this shit.
â€œTime is moneyâ€ has never been a more true statement.
5. You get overzealous to the point where you vividly imagine every apartment you see already being yours.
In fact, you’ve already made a Pinterest board full of decor ideas.
6. You come prepared to every open house with money and your checkbook on deck.
7. You quickly get used to seeing places that don’t have essential appliances, like a fridge and a stove.
Oops! Sorry, you can’t.
Or places that have a mini-fridge and a â€œhot plate.â€
Pretty sure I’m searching for an apartment and not a prison cell.
8. You eventually realize that you have to ask beforehand if a place has all the things you’ll need to survive.
9. When you go see a place, you take pictures of literally EVERYTHING in it.
The owner will, without a doubt, give you the side-eye.
10. Naturally, you find something wrong with almost every apartment you come by, and you start to wonder if you’re being too picky or if the universe just sucks.
$50 extra a month if I have a cat? Isn’t that a form of animal discrimination or something?
11. Seeing an apartment that actually matches its online description becomes somewhat of an anomaly.
12. You find out that looking for a roommate is a lot like the job interview process.
And you’re not feeling it one bit.
13. When a potential roommate doesn’t pick you after you basically told them your life story, you react a little irrationally.
You don’t open up to just anyone.
15. When you’re on the brink of going mentally insane, you’ll have an epiphany:
16. You’ll throw all that â€œlaundry in the buildingâ€ nonsense out the window.
Along with non-tandem parking and a private bathroom.
17. You’ll even take a place that has no fridge, stove, or a sink.
Let’s be real: All you really need is a floor.
18. You start to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it doesn’t include sleeping on a couch.
Or in an alley.