19 Times Having A Bitchy Resting Face Has Saved Your Life
By now everyone is well aware of what bitchy resting face (BRF) is, and has most likely experienced it at one time or another. Maybe you rock this mask on a daily basis or your best friend has had this look since the first day you two fell in love with each other.
But one thing is for certain: BRF is here and it’s not going anywhere. So what causes someone to have bitchy resting face, you may ask?
Well, as the amount of stupid people you encounter increases, so does that cold, hard and stern look across your face. The more annoyed you get at life, the more your face reflects that.
You may think this is a negative thing, but you couldn’t be more wrong. Sure, maybe it’s deterred a hot guy from approaching you at the bar, but you know what else it’s done?
Prevented creepers from approaching you as well. So before you start complaining, always try and look on the bright side.
So how does your BRF come in handy? In all the best ways, of course…
1. When solicitors try and bombard you on the street
He’s at one end of the block while you’re on the other; he has his clipboard ready and prepares to approach.
Then something happens… you both are able to make out the whites in each other’s eyes, and from that point, he knows there’s no way in hell you are going to stop and speak to him.
2. When someone is lost and needs direction
The worst time this can happen is in the morning while you’re rushing to work. Luckily, you have your BRF on, so no one dares to stop you in your tracks.
3. When an ugly guy thinks of approaching you at a bar
Your less-than-welcoming look tells this guy all he needs to know: BACK THE F OFF. And if, for some reason, your face doesn’t ward him off, the conversation will definitely be short-lived.
4. A coworker knows much better than to ask you to take on some of her work
It doesn’t matter if she is your work BFF, she knows when the right time to ask you for help is — never.
5. When you are trying to hold back your tears in an emotional situation
If you look like you are staying strong, then maybe you can successfully trick your mind into thinking you actually feel this way.
6. When you are trying to trick your boyfriend into thinking you are much more upset than you really are
“Why can’t I just f*cking cry? That would make things so much easier.”
Unfortunately, we’re not extremely-talented actresses who can cry on command, but the harder and more sullen you look at him, the worse he will feel. And let’s be serious for a moment — don’t even try and pretend you’ve never done this.
7. …Actually this goes for anyone and everyone
People don’t expect you to ever really feel bad about anything, so when you appear to do so, the result is astonishing. See! We do have feelings!
8. Salespeople never ask you if you want help
Is there anything more annoying than unsolicited advice while shopping? This is our retail therapy, we want to be left alone with the clothes! And if we need you, you will know.
9. You always win the passive-aggressive war
Yes, my friend, yes, you do.
10. No one ever expects you to apologize
…So when you do, it’s extra special and twice as heartfelt.
11. You don’t need to tell your friend you can’t stand her guy
Your face says it all, and guess what? It’s not even your fault because she asked and this just happens to be the way your face looks.
12. When you want the guy who just slept over to get the F out of your apartment
You don’t even know why the hell he would want to stick around any longer than he already has with that attitude of yours. Bye Felicia!
13. No one in your family would ever ask you to babysit
There’s no way you would be able to keep a child quiet with that scornful expression on your face.
Even if you actually tried (and come on, why would you?) you know there is no way you are keeping that baby calm.
14. No esthetician would ever dare f*ck up your requests
The woman who cuts your hair is terrified of you, the chick who does your nails dreads your next visit and your waxer would never dare to pull too roughly.
15. You get to avoid the old “OMG! I want you to meet so and so”
None of your friends want to introduce you to anyone new because they are well aware you really just don’t give a sh*t.
You’re in your mid-20s, you know everyone you need to know… at least for now.
16. Construction workers are scared of you
The look on your face says it all: DO NOT MESS WITH ME. And if for some reason they do not heed this warning, they are in for a rude awakening.
17. You don’t even know what a stop and chat is
Ain’t nobody got time for that, especially you. When you walk somewhere, you are on a mission and no one, not even people you know or like, are going to get in your way.
18. No one invades your personal space on the subway
Your death stare could literally kill someone, which comes in handy when traveling via public transportation.
19. You’ll need far less plastic surgery than your friends
Smiling gives you wrinkles, bitchy resting face keeps you pretty! Just keep telling yourself that whenever anyone calls you out for your BRF.
Photo Courtesy: MTV/The Hills