34 Reasons It’s A True Tragedy Tom Daley Isn’t Gay
1. Because Tom and literally any man would make an adorable, beautiful couple.
Especially fellow British diver Jack Laugher, because they are, like, actually perfect.
2. Because he looks truly spectacular surrounded by other half-naked men.
5. Because he looks too good in this underwear ad for women to have him all by themselves.
6. Because his cat probably wants it that way, to be honest.
(You can see it in her eyes.)
7. Because he likes beaches and lots of gay people also like beaches.
12. Because his selfie game is so strong that most women probably would not even know what to do with him.
I mean, come on.
13. Because millions of gay guys everywhere would be very happy if he was.
15. I’m just saying…
16. Because he looks good in a suit, is what I was getting at.
17. Because he is beautiful and being gay would make him glow even more.
(Gay people glow, it’s science.)
18. Because he’s working with a lot…
19. And, c’mon ladies…
20. I’m just worried this would be too much.
23. Anyway… Because he is very comfortable giving man-on-man love.
25. And they probably would be super happy together and make adorable babies.*
*I know, I know, but can you imagine?
27. Because he’s just adorable and I want it to be this way.
32. Because he is too beautiful for only one gender to truly love and appreciate.
33. Also because he’s smart and goes to school and would probably rationally choose to spend his life with a man if he wasn’t straight anyway.
34. And because all men desperately want to be his boyfriend (even though he’s not gay and we totally respect his straight lifestyle, it’s just a thing that would be nice).
Let us dream.
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