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34 Reasons It’s A True Tragedy Tom Daley Isn’t Gay

1. Because Tom and literally any man would make an adorable, beautiful couple.

Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images for Nickelodeon UK

Especially fellow British diver Jack Laugher, because they are, like, actually perfect.

2. Because he looks truly spectacular surrounded by other half-naked men.

3. Because he’s too good at thrusting in the water with other guys for this skill to go to waste.


4. And because he’s too good at dancing on the beach with other guys to let THAT skill go to waste.


5. Because he looks too good in this underwear ad for women to have him all by themselves.

6. Because his cat probably wants it that way, to be honest.

(You can see it in her eyes.)

7. Because he likes beaches and lots of gay people also like beaches.

8. Because these ducks want him to be gay, too.

9. Because he has a truly fabulous taste in hats.

10. And a generally flawless choice of outerwear.

11. And an always spectacular taste in shoes.

12. Because his selfie game is so strong that most women probably would not even know what to do with him.

I mean, come on.

13. Because millions of gay guys everywhere would be very happy if he was.

Getty Images / Adidas

14. Because…

Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images for Nickelodeon UK

15. I’m just saying…

Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images for Nickelodeon UK

16. Because he looks good in a suit, is what I was getting at.

Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images for Nickelodeon UK

17. Because he is beautiful and being gay would make him glow even more.

Because he is beautiful and being gay would make him glow even more.

View this image ›

Clive Rose / Getty Images

(Gay people glow, it’s science.)

18. Because he’s working with a lot…

Al Bello / Getty Images

19. And, c’mon ladies…

Clive Rose / Getty Images

20. I’m just worried this would be too much.

Clive Rose / Getty Images


Clive Rose / Getty Images

23. Anyway… Because he is very comfortable giving man-on-man love.

Adam Pretty / Getty Images

24. And he and every other man look perfect together.

25. And they probably would be super happy together and make adorable babies.*

*I know, I know, but can you imagine?

26. Because this is how he showers and, I guess it’s not related, but still.


27. Because he’s just adorable and I want it to be this way.

28. Because of this irrelevant (but very important) visual.

29. Because he can handle balls very well.

(I’m sorry.)


32. Because he is too beautiful for only one gender to truly love and appreciate.

Adam Pretty / Getty Images

33. Also because he’s smart and goes to school and would probably rationally choose to spend his life with a man if he wasn’t straight anyway.

Julian Finney / Getty Images

34. And because all men desperately want to be his boyfriend (even though he’s not gay and we totally respect his straight lifestyle, it’s just a thing that would be nice).

Let us dream.

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