Dear Men, You Seriously Need To Stop Wearing Jorts

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Consider this your public service announcement.

1. You know who looks good in jorts?

You know who looks good in jorts?

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Via itstheskinny.tumblr.com

2. Women.

Women.

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3. And only women.

And only women.

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David Krieger/Bauer-Griffin / Getty

4. Not a single man in history has ever looked good in jorts.

Dear Men, You Seriously Need To Stop Wearing Jorts

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Via silveredcosmos.tumblr.com

5. Not any actors…

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6. Athletes…

Athletes...

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7. Or musical artists.

Or musical artists.

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Via Twitter: @canarrys

8. You know why?

9. Because jorts are ugly and make cool people look stupid.

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10. They are basically the macaroni necklaces of adulthood.

Dear Men, You Seriously Need To Stop Wearing Jorts

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A&E / Gurney Productions

Except nobody is legitimately proud to wear a macaroni necklace.

11. 90% of the time, jorts are far too tight and tiny to be acceptable in public.

90% of the time, jorts are far too tight and tiny to be acceptable in public.

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The world doesn’t want to see your impossibly white thighs, the bottom of your pockets, or the strands of denim dangling over those pockets.

12. And when they’re not super short, they are ridiculously big and baggy.

And when they're not super short, they are ridiculously big and baggy.

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Andrew H. Walker / Getty Images

What are you trying to hide under there?

13. Not only do they lack so many of the necessary qualities of other shorts, such as comfort and range of motion…

Dear Men, You Seriously Need To Stop Wearing Jorts

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Via jhutchandbeer.tumblr.com

14. But they’re also totally impractical.

But they're also totally impractical.

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You know what I like on a sweltering summer day? Hot denim rubbing against my thighs and scrunched up into my crotch.

15. And if jorts truly were “freeing” don’t you think uniforms would be made out of denim or that maybe gymnasts and runners would wear them?

And if jorts truly were "freeing" don't you think uniforms would be made out of denim or that maybe gymnasts and runners would wear them?

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Via Cameron Spencer / Staff

16. And I’m sorry but jorts are NOT American.

And I'm sorry but jorts are NOT American.

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Via pinterest.com

The star spangled banner is American. Your silly attempt at summer wear is just cheap and sad.

17. Or badass.

Or badass.

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Fred Norris / HBO

18. They are stupid, hideous, and should be removed from your life.

Dear Men, You Seriously Need To Stop Wearing Jorts

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Via tania-talk.tumblr.com

19. So the next time you grab a pair of scissors, looking to cut your next pair of jorts…

So the next time you grab a pair of scissors, looking to cut your next pair of jorts...

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Victor Tatum / BuzzFeed / Via buzzfeed.com

20. Remember that nobody wants to see you looking like this.

Remember that nobody wants to see you looking like this.

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buzzfeed.com / Via Victor Tatum / BuzzFeed

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/mrloganrhoades/dear-men-you-seriously-need-to-stop-wearing-jorts

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