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Do You Know How To Respond To This Text Message Correctly?

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A quick and nearly painless evaluation of your texting stewardship.

  1. You have definitive plans with someone who texts you the following message the day of. What do you text back?

Do You Know How To Respond To This Text Message Correctly?

  1. You got: You’re in phone jail.

    Don’t text the single letter “K,” ever. In your desperate bid to save yourself the time needed to type ONE MORE LETTER, you appear too-busy (which assuredly you are not) and disinterested. Show some zeal for life! Show some enthusiasm for this message’s recipient, your dear pal who is excited to see you! Wake up! Life goes on around you! JOIN IN!

  2. You got: You’re in phone jail.

    You would never in one million years say “kk” out loud. If you cannot bear to say it out loud in conversation—and surely you cannot, because it would be mortifying and horrific—you have no good reason to text it. It’s baby talk. It’s gibberish. It’s atrocious and bad. There is no excuse for it. You’re typing two letters anyway! Get them right!


  3. You got: You’re in phone jail.

    If you would say “lol” to THIS you would say it to ANYTHING and that is simply inexcusable. “lol” used to MEAN something (laughing out loud. Remember??). Lol does not mean yes, or no, or ok, or hello, or goodbye. Get your shit together. Stop laughing at things that aren’t even funny, or meant to be.


  4. You got: You’re in phone jail.

    There are times and places to use a period in a text message, but this is not one of them. A period in this context is hostile, curt, tonally ambiguous. A period after “ok” means “ok fine but I REALLY DO NOT CARE FOR YOU OR OUR PLANS.” Better to go without punctuation entirely than to angrily slam the door on the end of your message in this manner.


  5. You got: You’re in phone jail.

    What is that ellipsis?? Throw your phone away!!! What is going on here. I am so confused by this one and it’s all over the place. Some of you are using ellipses in totally inexplicable ways and I cannot … explain it. (<— fair use!) An ellipsis is not a period. An ellipsis does not make you seem thoughtful. An ellipsis in a text indicates confusion, speechlessness, and/or annoyance. THAT’S IT.


  6. You got: You’re a good texter.

    Congratulations! You know how to communicate effectively, concisely, and with the sensitivity this medium requires. You’re willing to take a few extra seconds to make a text right, and you know a punctuation mark is worth a thousand words. Exclamation points, as you know, literally save relationships.

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